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Monday, February 9, 2009

How manage your everyday life in many situation....


Life is full of frustrating moments — here's how to keep from boiling over

Manage Your Anger.........

Even in times when full-on anger is justified, social protocol sometimes prevents you from truly venting.
Here, how to express yourself without coming off like a hothead or a doormat.
Anger Style: Explosive

What It Looks Like: “If you leave your jacket on the floor one more time, I’m leaving you!” It may take a lot to push you over the edge, but when you get there, the earth shakes and people run for cover.


Why You Might Do It: If you were never taught how to deal with irritation, you may habitually swallow it until you can swallow no more.


Eventually your top will blow. Some people are anger junkies, who get off on the adrenaline rush of an emotional explosion, not to mention the fact that the onslaught can mean they get their way — at least in the short term.


The Damage: It is virtually impossible to feel empathy and anger simultaneously, so in the heat of the moment, you are more likely to say and do overly harsh things that you later regret.
How to Turn It Around
Wait it out. “Research has shown that the neurological anger response lasts less than two seconds,” says Ronald Potter-Efron, Ph.D., an anger-management specialist in Eau Claire, Wisconsin, and a coauthor of Letting Go of Anger.


Beyond that, it takes a commitment to stay angry. Mentally recite the Pledge of Allegiance or count to 10 and see if the urge to explode has diminished.
Own your emotions. A simple rephrasing of your feelings can help you feel more in control. “I’m really upset by your behavior” is much more effective and empowering than %#*&@! For more tips on handling your anger in the heat of the moment, consult.




How to Deal with Anger Gracefully....


Smile. You can’t work yourself into a rage without an angry face. Relax the muscles in your jaw, forehead, and lips to keep cool, then eke out a grin.
Look ahead. Will this thing matter in five minutes? Five months? Five years? If not, why bother wasting energy on it?
Put yourself in charge. Saying “I am choosing not to get angry about this” (or the opposite) can be empowering.
Adopt a more flexible philosophy of life.


A few truths: Things won’t always go your way. Accidents happen. The world is an imperfect place. Repeat as necessary.
Think of the harm you may cause. Say your child comes home past his curfew. Your options are screaming .



(outcome: an ugly late-night shouting match) or telling him that you’re quite upset and that you’ll talk first thing in the morning (outcome: a more coherent and calm discussion).



Anger Style: SarcasmWhat It Looks Like: “It’s OK that you’re late. I had time to read the menu — 40 times.” You find a roundabout way of getting your digs in, with a half smile. Why You Might Do It: You were probably raised to believe that expressing negative emotions directly isn’t OK, so you take a more indirect route. If folks get mad, it’s their fault, not yours. After all, you were just kidding. Can’t people take a joke? The Damage: Even though couched in wit, your cutting comments can damage your relationships. Although some people insist that mockery is a form of intellectual humor, the very word sarcasm is related to the Greek word sarkazein, meaning “to tear flesh like dogs.” Ouch.
How to Turn It Around
Give it to them straight. “Sarcasm is passive-aggressive communication,” explains counselor Carlos R. Todd. Find words to express how you feel head-on. You might explain to a tardy friend, say, after you’re seated, “I wish you would try to be on time, especially when you know we have limited time.”
Be firm and clear. This is especially true with children, to whom a gentle “Jumping on the furniture is not acceptable” sends a much clearer message than the snarky “Don’t worry — we just happen to have $2,000 set aside for a new sofa.”
Speak up before you get bitter. Exercising assertiveness prior to arriving at your personal breaking point can help prevent a sarcastic streak from popping out

A daily life can be managed much better

Daily life can be managed much better with a clear dream to life and resource management.

What Do We miss or Lose Every Day?
It is very vital to know we are, and what we are doing. Every night before I can reach to my house, which is half an hour away from my work place I have this mood that I have lost so many things, and gained so few things during the previous day. It has a bitter filling to know that you could have been better and you lost a lot of opportunities during the day. But last night it was more unusual. I did not think about the mistakes I had made throughout the day, I just stared analyzing what I could have done that I have not!

It started with what I had:

1. The time

2. The brain (I am not so much clever, but I can understand a few thing around)

3. The available budget

4. The friends of mine

5. People around in my work place

6. The tools I had (several fast computers, a huge amount of books, and digital libraries)

7. Experience

8. Health and safety

All and all I had many things around myself, but what I did, and what I gained where almost nothing compared to them.

Istarted analyzing my daily life’s mistakes, and it was like below:
I checked my email several times during the day as I was waiting for an important email, then I chatted with a few friends online about nonsense and useless things around. During the day I had to wait for one of the clerks, in the office for 45 min’s as he was talking to someone else. To continue of my current project I had to get some papers from him. I lost so much time, for nothing.

I did not use my brain to manage my time more efficiently, so I lost some more time on it. I did not think of a new method to do the project I was working for, so that I decided to find out how others have done it on the internet, I did not use my brain here neither and could not find a solution from the internet too.

Overall I was did not gain much thing from the day I had, lost one more day without a good outcome that can make me content about my life.

more...............

Personal continuity
In psychology (which historically is philosophically concerned with dualism), personal continuity, also called personal persistence, is the uninterrupted connection concerning a particular person of his or her private life and personality. Personal continuity is the union affecting the facets arising from personality in order to avoid discontinuities from one moment of time to another time.
Personal continuity is an important part of identity; this is the process of ensuring that the quality of the mind are consistent from moment to the next, generally regarded to comprise qualities such as self-awareness, sentience, sapience, and the ability to perceive the relationship between oneself and one's environment. Personal continuity is the property of a continuous and connected period of time and is intimately concerned with a person's body or physical being. Associationism, or the method of how ideas combine in the mind, allows events or views to be associated with each other in the mind, thus leading to a form of learning. Associations can result from contiguity, similarity, or contrast. Through contiguity, one associates ideas or events that usually happen to occur at the same time. Some of these events form an autobiographical memory in which each is a personal representation of the general or specific events and personal facts.